Team of Int’l WHO Scientists Discredit Lab Theory as Chinese Gov’t Smiles with Glee

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Of one thing we are all certain, the coronavirus was given birth in the dark, dank, feces ridden, streets of Communist China.

The commies may have willfully dispersed the air-borne particles as part of a diabolical plot as yet to fully unfold. A second theory is that a hungry scientist tripped over the wrong beaker in his rush out the door for an eggroll. But consider the possibility of the virus not coming from a lab at all.

In their endless quests to ascertain only the most reliable of information, Chinese and international scientists teamed up in Wuhan, China, to get the bottom of the nonsense. For the very first time, they have all reached an identical conclusion.

COVID-19 was not developed in a scientific lab, secret or otherwise. In fact, as some early theories suggested, it isn’t manmade at all. The virus jumped from an animal to an innocent human who was simply in the process of trying to have a good day. Period.

Collectively, the scientists have dismissed all false claims of the virus having originated in a Chinese lab. It was an unsubstantiated theory and never anything more.

The World Health Organization closely observed as the findings were uncovered, but this still did little in helping them pinpoint the exactness of the pandemic’s beginning. According to WHO mission leader, Peter Ben Embarek, there is still much to try and understand.

After a four week stay in Wuhan, the joint Chinese-WHO team claims they have seen enough to clear the Wuhan Institute of Virology of any wrongdoing, whether intentionally done or by a clutz needing an eggroll.

Initially, a theory was kicked around about a guy eating a bat he had purchased from a skanky wet market, but Embarek believes this is only a portion of the story. It may have started with a monkey but then it jumped to another unspecified animal prior to jumping on a human, and this, of course, has caused the need for an ongoing investigation. Please donate.

“The findings suggest that the laboratory incidents hypothesis is extremely unlikely to explain the introduction of the virus to the human population,” Embarek said.

So, there ya go.

Though much time has already passed since the pandemic’s onset, Embarek claims this mission was only the first step in trying to nail down the virus’s exact origin. Many scientists have suggested the origin to be a bamboo rat, pangolin, or other type trash eating creature of the wild.

How the transmission made it from the animal to a human is still way up in the air.

Despite the Chinese governments outstretched arms to the WHO in welcoming their assistance in helping to clear their self-professed good name, they have also made things difficult for the investigators.

Beijing has ordered all scientists to not speak with reporters under penalty of law. They have also specifically designated who they are allowed to speak with, where they are allowed to visit, and what they are allowed to see. So, in all fairness to the report’s lack of reliability…

Liang Wanniang, representing the team’s Chinese scientists, said, “We haven’t been able to fully do the research, but there is no indication there were clusters before what we saw happen in the later part of December in Wuhan.”

The next step for the scientists will be combing the farms in the local hillsides, with a keen focus on those that raise bats for food. This is going to take the team a very long time, and the Chinese government could not be more pleased. Take all the time you need.

The longer the scientist keep coming up empty-handed in their planned futile search, the easier it is for the Communists to keep doing whatever it is they’re doing.